Heart over Mind; Fear of Change

My Sister asked me, “How can we get people to let go of their old shit!?”  The short answer is, we can’t do it.  First and foremost, a person has to seek their own change. Unless someone is ready to stop accepting a pattern or behavior, no change will occur. 

Our world can be separated into two zones. Mind and heart, ego and sacred/higher self, body and soul, individual and God, single and collective are all ways to express our components.  I will use Mind and Heart.  Mind is our experiences, thoughts, and habits that we identify as our own.  These are things we “know” and so we feel safe with them. Heart is our bigger (yet ironically, less visible or easy to access) self that taps into the unlimited energy, connection, and potential, of the universe.  Heart is a mysterious and vast unknown.  To tap into Heart, we have to leave Mind behind and that can feel very uncomfortable or even impossible to some people.

Two things inhibit people from seeking change; fear of the unknown and pain of growth.  We are creatures of habit, comfort, and safety.  Our Mind protects us from the world by creating habits that serve us well based on past experiences.  Mind says, “Don’t touch hot things!”  Mind can also say things like, “Don’t talk to Dad for at least 15 minutes after he gets home from work.”  or, “Buy that cool thing because that will make you happy.” Or, “Let’s check Face book and see who liked my post.” Mind also enjoys the path of least resistance. It likes habits and smooth sailing. This makes sense for conserving energy for 3D survival. Mind guides us through life building paths, bridges, and walls, whatever we need to find our way safely through.  But Mind is also prohibitive.  Its paths can become ruts, its bridges can become avoidance, and its walls can become boxes.  Leaving these habits requires us to forge new avenues which is hard work and sometimes scary, because the outcome is not always clear. 

This is Faith.  Faith is belief that a path based on Heart will serve you well.

Let’s talk about Heart.  Heart is the energy and connection that is available to all of us.  It is nature, love, beauty, and creativity.  It is nurturing, giving, and healing, like an eternal parent.  Heart lives in all of us and connects us all.  Because we can’t see it and sometimes have trouble defining it, Mind likes to diminish it.  Mind is concerned with thoughts, stories, what ifs, and remember whens.  Heart is like vast, liquid ocean of possibility, love, peace, vulnerability and unity with no past and no future.  

For some the problem is three fold:  First, there was some damage or trauma causing excessive pains and shame to which mind reacts with paths, bridges, and walls.  Second, he/she was not taught how to move through pain by reaching Heart.  And third, there is the fear of change and growth that we all have.  This is where the term “hitting Bottom” comes in.  Bottom is a point in our lives that forces change in our behavior.  Even a person without trauma, and in touch with Heart, can reach a proverbial Bottom.  It’s a point of, “This is not working for me anymore.  What do I have to do to change it?”

Let’s say we have hit a Bottom.  Even Mind knows it.  What can we do?  We feel lost, alone, unsure, confused, insecure, and powerless.   How on Earth do we move forward from such a place?  We have to reconstruct based on Faith.   We have to find strength in ourselves by looking outside of our limiting Mind ways.  Leaving Mind behind opens us to behaviors based on Heart.  By looking inward to see what dwells inside us, not what has shaped us from the outside we begin to rebuild. Step by step, little by little, we find a truer and stronger version of ourselves.  We take on an importance in the world that is no longer confined by our Mind.  Our Heart leads us a better understanding and limitless love for ourselves, others, and the world which we share.  

Let’s say we recognize that many of our behaviors are rooted in Mind’s protective but limiting ways.  How can we change?  From where can new behavior come if not Mind?  Vulnerability is our greatest strength.  If one can act from the collective and benevolent energy of Heart and not ego, she/he is tapping into the energy of the Universe.  The very things that Mind had been carefully and painstakingly trying to achieve now flow through you with less effort.  The irony is, it doesn’t matter.  You don’t need them anymore because you are in touch with a greater selfless energy.  What can I get?  Becomes what can I give?  

There are infinite ways to practice living from your heart. I turn to my heart in breath. When my mind is racing and telling me what has been and what might be, I make a conscious decision to stop.  As I breathe, I focus on my heart.  I literally force my energy to leave my mind and go to my heart.  Breathing from the heart is instantly calming.  My mind has no place there.  When I breath into my heart I discover peace, strength, and vitality. Suddenly, I know what to do or say, or not say.  Because it is not based in thought, it is based in letting go.  

Another way to discover your connection to you higher self is to pay attention to what you are shown and open to all possibilities. Break down Mind’s walls. Don’t take denial’s bridges. Our self awereness is our key. No one will can be self aware for you! If you are having bad interactions or feel you are not in alignment, pay attention; the Universe is speaking to you. Your independent thought is a gift from the Source. Nurture it. I find that when I do, I am wonderfully surprised by the collective like mindedness that is revealed. What is good is good. What is healthy is healthy. What we all want is unconditional love and wellbeing for ourselves and the Earth that sustains us.

Entering into flow energizes and feeds us. It’s like a Heart I.V. What is flow varies from person to person. It can be creativity, music, nature, activity, art, or a practice of any kind. We are so fortunate to be able to experience the world in a ways beyond the struggle for survival. Human’s around the world are in the struggle. Chances are, if you are reading my blog, you are not. It’s our job to elevate the collective by getting bigger and giving it back. Do not ad to the struggle. Become more. Follow the inducement to grow and give. If you have the means to do so, why squander it when others do not?

And finally, find faith. It doesn’t matter in what or who you place your faith. Faith is belief that a path based in Heart will serve you well. It’s that simple.

Change is not painless or easy. But a brighter light awaits after the darkness.